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Saturday, February 26, 2011

negative positive


When is a negative actually a positive?

I think it can be. I had my weekly talk with my mother this morning and, as happens far, far too often, got extremely frustrated with her. The conversation went something like this:

Me: "Hi! how are you?"

She, (long sigh) "I'm so depressed."

Me: "What is it?"

She: "I had such a pain in my chest last night. It's gone now, but I had such a pain."

Me: "But you're all right."

She: "I don't know. You don't know what it's like."

Me: "Mom - stop it! Every time I call you're like this. Can't you just once say something cheerful?"

She: "I just won't say anything any more. You don't understand."

You get the idea. Decades ago, I made a vow that I would never be like she was at that time. At that time I recall her as being weepy and depressed ALL the time. This is a negative right? Well, maybe. While I made a very strong vow, I also had a picture in my mind of how I would be different in middle age - of how I would be healthy and energetic and full of well being.

When I vowed (quite passionately) this morning to never be like that, meaning full of aches and pains and complaints and martyrdom when I reach age 95, I also had a passionate sense of what I would be like - feisty and strong and healthy and happy.

So far so good on all fronts.

Listen folks - if you ever hear me talking about how tough life is or if I give you intricate details about my aches and pains, shoot me, okay?

2 comments:

  1. I think that fearing you will be like your parents is a very common concern. I've spent what seems like a lifetime trying to behave the opposite to my mum. But that's just another extreme! But I still catch myself saying things the way she does or making decisions the way she does and that's okay. Fact is there are a lot of very good qualities I have learned from both my parents. If we don't have the bad to compare good with, how would we know how good 'good' really is?
    Thanks for sharing Goody, always insightful!

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